Butting Diva? Pleeease

Me: Hey, You are butting (I was speaking Spanish, of course)

A.H: Excuse me? (the prick answered in English)

Me: I said, Stop butting me!

A.H: No problem (again, he replied in English, pretending that he couldn´t understand)

Me: Look, I´ve heard you speaking Spanish before so don´t give me that crap ( I couldn't believe that someone would dare to do that stupid trick, specially when his English accent was sooo lame)

A.H: (mute)

Me: Plus, we can speak English, if that´s what you want (I said that in English)

A.H: Oh Please, please, please, please, please, please (seriously he said Por favor like a million times, very mad). What are you saying? I´ve been here for 2 hours and you´ve just arrived. ( He was very uncomfortable because everybody started to pay attention to our conversation)

Me: I´ve just arrived and you were not here!

A.H: Oh god, why do I have to speak to a Concha? (if you don´t know the meaning of concha go here. In Argentina, this term is used by gay guys to refer to women and it´s not as offensive as in other countries)

Me: Probably because you cannot speak to a Penis anymore (He was a middle aged decadent gay guy)

A.H: This is my space also, that´s your space, this is mine (he started mumbling incoherences). There are no barriers.

Me: There is an invisible barrier between you and me that you don´t have to cross

A.H: Don´t give queers a hard time, my love.

Me: I´m not giving you or any queer a hard time, ask my friends ( My friends: 3 homos). Just get out of my way.

A.H: Please, please, please, please ( he started with the por favor once more, he knew that he was not going to win and he was sooooo mad. My friends were laughing out loud right next to him)

Me: Stop it!!!!

The guy finally went away and I was happy again. Once more I saved the world from the irrespectfulness and stupidity of arrogant porteños.