The worst of Buenos Aires: Why not?
When you visit a place, you are always eager to find the best places and the coolest things to do, but the lame, the bizarre, the ugly stuff is also an important part of each city/culture. And in same cases it could be the rule and not the exception.
Buenos Aires has, fortunately a lot of great things, and you´ll find them easily in your guide book; but what about when you just want a shitty dinner? Well, I can give you some advice.
Worst tango show: La ideal
You don´t want to miss the tango show while you are in Buenos Aires and that´s ok. Where else would you find such great dancers and musician like here in its birth place? But you are just too cool to book a show at Mr Tango. Don´t worry, for a lot less you can get a much worse Tango show. La ideal tango show sucks. But i´t so bad that you´ll enjoy it. Everything is so low-cost and bad-taste that it actually ends up being a must-see if you are into Bizarre tango shows. Enjoy it!
Worst neighbourhood: Villa ortuzar
Maybe it´s because of its name that this neighbourhood is so shitty(Ortuzar: orto means butt). It´s not only ugly but also boring. When you get off the subway stop (Tronador) all you can see is the nothingness itself. No good restaurants, no green parks; just nothing. It worth a visit if you are planing on committing suicide
Worst drink: Fernet con coca
I wonder why this is the most popular drink in Buenos Aires (and maybe in Argentina) when it tastes like an expired herbal medicine. It does helps you to get drunk pretty fast though. Don´t miss it!
Worst service: ?
There has been a tie between all the restaurants/bars in Palermo attended by waitresses /"artists" in Palermo, and the old bars attended by waiters who are over 85 and suffer hemorrhoids. Anyway, I promise that you won´t miss a bad service while you visit our city, even if you are not looking forward to it.
Worst pizza:
There are a lot of new pizza-chains that suck; but if I have to choose a winner; I´d go for the pizza that you can find in the international students parties. You cannot complaint though, because it´s usually for free or you pay like 10 pesos for cheap wine plus all the pizza you can eat. Bu I guess that if you are drinking bad wine, lousy pizza is a good match, right?
Buenos Aires has, fortunately a lot of great things, and you´ll find them easily in your guide book; but what about when you just want a shitty dinner? Well, I can give you some advice.
Worst tango show: La ideal
You don´t want to miss the tango show while you are in Buenos Aires and that´s ok. Where else would you find such great dancers and musician like here in its birth place? But you are just too cool to book a show at Mr Tango. Don´t worry, for a lot less you can get a much worse Tango show. La ideal tango show sucks. But i´t so bad that you´ll enjoy it. Everything is so low-cost and bad-taste that it actually ends up being a must-see if you are into Bizarre tango shows. Enjoy it!
Worst neighbourhood: Villa ortuzar
Maybe it´s because of its name that this neighbourhood is so shitty(Ortuzar: orto means butt). It´s not only ugly but also boring. When you get off the subway stop (Tronador) all you can see is the nothingness itself. No good restaurants, no green parks; just nothing. It worth a visit if you are planing on committing suicide
Worst drink: Fernet con coca
I wonder why this is the most popular drink in Buenos Aires (and maybe in Argentina) when it tastes like an expired herbal medicine. It does helps you to get drunk pretty fast though. Don´t miss it!
Worst service: ?
There has been a tie between all the restaurants/bars in Palermo attended by waitresses /"artists" in Palermo, and the old bars attended by waiters who are over 85 and suffer hemorrhoids. Anyway, I promise that you won´t miss a bad service while you visit our city, even if you are not looking forward to it.
Worst pizza:
There are a lot of new pizza-chains that suck; but if I have to choose a winner; I´d go for the pizza that you can find in the international students parties. You cannot complaint though, because it´s usually for free or you pay like 10 pesos for cheap wine plus all the pizza you can eat. Bu I guess that if you are drinking bad wine, lousy pizza is a good match, right?
14 comments:
I almost agree with your list, but I'd like to defend Ferrnet. It's a very strange drink, but I would label it "unique" and not worst. And it's very "authentic Argentine" if that's what you're after. And it's a little more tolerable if you throw a slice of lemon in there :)
Hi Amber, I´ll try that lemon slice and maybe I´ll change my mind. I have to confess that I used to drink a lot of fernet and maybe that´s why I cannot tolerate it anymore.
best
This is a novel idea. I'm bored with how wonderful blah blah blah... Don't get me wrong - I'm not looking to focus on the negative but its good to give people the straight up truth.
I would add...
Lack of coins
Crazy bus / taxi drivers
Dog Poo everywhere
Red tape to get any paperwork done
Mindless boring TV
but I still love this country!
thank you for making the list bigger.
best
Hi!I'm from Buenos Aires, I've just discovered your blog. You certainly made me laugh with this post, and I agree 100% with the worst service part. The fernet con coca stuff is still an unsolved mistery from me, and I'm from here, so I can understand ;)
ups, recién leo que sos de acá, jaja
Hola Flor, gracias por los comentarios.
beso
I'd like to know what quickroute means by "red tape to get any paperwork done".
I think USians are a bunch of impatient arrogant pricks when it comes to standing in line to do ANYTHING. It's as if there aren't any waiting lines in their home country and they need to bitch and scream like stabbed pigs any time they have to sit and wait 10 minutes or stand in line with more than 2 people in front of them.
Of course, I could be wrong.
Two examples: I lost my national ID card (DNI) before the last elections... I went to the CGP nearest to my home a month before the elections, I waited 8 minutes, filled a form, and they issued me a "DNI request affidavit".
A week before the election, as I needed to have my DNI to vote, I went to the National Persons Registry (Registro Nac. De las Personas, RENAPER) and had my replacement DNI with me during the day. Yes, I had to wait 20 minutes because there were 10/12 people in line in front of me. So what?
Example #2: getting my passport: this took longer as I did it back in 2003 when there were problems with imported security inks used to print the passports, so they were under a heavy backlog. Still, I went in at 9:00am and went out at 11:00 (the whole process is digitalized from fingerprint scanning to photo). There were literally thousands of people at the PFA that day.
Example #3: changing my water service mailing address/name. Went in, took a number, waited 5 minutes for my number to be called, handled DNI and ownership title, I was out in 5-10 minutes later.
So WTF of red tape are these guys talking about?. I have bank accounts at 2 public (State owned) banks and a cooperative one, opening an account was an in/out exercise.
Instead, for a private bank, I filled an internet service request and I'm still awaiting for their call, I phone back and they're allways "too busy to take my call".
Paying bills/invoices? I do it all on-line. Failing that I do it over the phone with Pagophone and a credit card.
Yet, I see some people on the street in long lines at pharmacies etc where they take "Pago Facil" with their utilities bills and cash at hand waiting to pay. They must be stupid, it's not my fault.
Go figure.
FC
@ Fernando Cassia :
Counter examples to yours as experienced by my Argentine wife
Collecting goods shipped from UK and clearing thru customs - mountains of paperwork and procedures spread across different offices plus greased palms to make it happen smoothly - nightmare
Picking up a replacement DNI - 3.5 hour wait
Applying for a new passport - 3 hour wait just to drop off the forms and 1 month wait for passport to be posted
Picking up an international delivery from the post office took about 8 hours see details here
p.s. I'm not "USian" - I'm Irish
On a positive note - I still choose to live here because it's better than anywhere else I've lived so I guess the pros outweigh the cons!
Hi Quicroute!
Thanks for your comment.
The customs issue is a whole different ordeal.
The Ezeiza customs (and my that I mean the TCA private operator in Ezeiza - if that's what you refer to) is anti-customer.
The customs at Retiro (for international shipments not done by courier) could also use some expansion to better facilities (the place is small and the volume of people going through it has skyrocketed in recent years).
Yet, in NO CASE I'd "grease the palms" of anybody. That's encouraging the same corruption of public officials that people then decry.
In any case, I don't want to turn this into a long tirade, but if you follow some specific rules, things should go smoothly:
#1 Don't use DHL, or TNT, they're the worst couriers known to man when dealing with customs (specially in Argentina)
#2 If you have to use a courier, use FedEX or UPS
#3 If you have ANYTHING that plugs into 110v or 220v AC, DO NOT use a courier (this has to do with customs restrictions too long to explain)
#4 The "Express Mail System" (EMS) offered by public mail services across the world WORKS WONDERS. From the USA to .AR use USPS EMS.
-Do NOT use USPS "Global Express Guaranteed" which is just a renamed FedEX service-
EMS from USA to Argentina takes 5 days, items clear customs automagically, and the package is received at your home with an employee from Correo Argentino billing you for any import duties.
Just make sure an invoice is included with the package!..
EMS shipments also include an end-to-end tracking, just like a courier, but without its problems.
#5 Importing used goods is forbidden. BUT if you're a foreigner moving here, you are allowed to bring your stuff, I think 1 shipment per year during the first two years (I have to check). The downside? you end up in Ezeiza's TCA walking around shipping containers.
Why these restrictions? Well, this is a country where dodging the customs has been throuh history a national past time. And in the past commercial importers abused the mail system to bring items for resale without paying taxes, sort of a way to get a competitive edge.
For reasons I don't know, some people think it's OK to cheat the customs, while the same people are those whom complain about the high taxes (gee, if everybody paid, perhaps taxes would be lower)..
I blame this cheating culture on Argentina's half-Italian heritage... as there's the same kind of attitude in Italy.
In any case, it sucks.
FC
Hey guys, thank you for your comments.
You cannot imagine how much I´m missing the worst of argentina!!!
best
@ Fernando Cassia : - good advice and perspectives - thanks for taking the time to post this useful info - Suerte
Glad of being of help.
I also don't want my comment to be thought of as anti-American, but I've seen loud USians* with very little patience a lot of times.
Sadly, this "short-tempered" disease is increasingly spreading to the local populace :)....
Back to subject: believe me, I learned all this the hard way... as I do this for a living (receiving electronic kit from abroad for review, as I work as an IT journalist).
I think the Royal Mail does "EMS" shipments to Argentina. They call it "International Express Service"
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=%22Royal+Mail%22+%22international+express+service%22&btnG=Search
But I realize now that Ireland does have its own postal service... Hrmmm... you'd have to check on that one...
Wait... I just found Ireland listed as a member of the EMS service
http://www.ems.coop/site/Main.php?Oid=250&Sid=7
FC
PS: Remember in order for the automatic customs clearance to work, your item must include an invoice, if possible two, one inside the package (in case it's opened by the customs) and another outside the package if possible (in one of those clear auto-adhesive pouches the kind of used by FedEX or UPS. And don't cheat on the value, $5 or $10 on a $100 item will have your item delayed at customs anyway. If you put a reasonable value, it'll pass through.
Caveat: have cash in hand to pay the mailman, as they'll ring your door only TWICE (two consecutive days). From the USA to .AR EMS service takes 5-7 days.
@ Fernando Cassia : Thanks again for researching and posting this info.
I'm only too familiar with the ridiculous complaints of expats posting stuff here - case in point...
here
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